


Hotsy Totsy Baby

by alittlegreenrosetta



Series: Jazz Age Joker [1]
Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon-Typical Violence, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Smut, F/F, F/M, Old timey slang, Past Rape/Non-con, yes even some old timey slang in the smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-13
Updated: 2015-10-22
Packaged: 2018-04-26 06:52:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 17,287
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4994464
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alittlegreenrosetta/pseuds/alittlegreenrosetta
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In 1927 Gotham City, Jack Napier is the leader of the biggest bootlegging outfit around. One night on a visit to Gotham's illustrious Iceberg Lounge, a little blond hoofer with a troubled past catches his eye and before he knows what's hit him, he's goofy for the daffy doll.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Jack “The Joker” Napier was standing in front of the Iceberg Lounge wishing he didn’t have to go inside. He had a meeting with Oswald Cobblepot, owner of the Iceberg, Gotham’s most famous and elite speakeasy. Cobblepot appeared to be an odious little man and Jack hated the idea of having to interact with him at all. But Jack was quickly becoming the biggest supplier of Canadian Club whiskey to the Metropolis-Gotham area and dealing with people like Cobblepot was unavoidable. Every time he took over some other gang’s territory he had to go let the juice joint owners know who they were dealing with now. By this point in the game everyone in Gotham knew who the Joker was and most were afraid of him. He had strong ties in Chicago that scared anyone foolish enough not be afraid of Jack Napier’s gang for their own sake. Well there was nothing to do but get this over with. Joker signaled to Rocco, his muscle for the night, and they entered the speak.

The minute the door opened a blast of hot jazz could be heard from the band inside. The nondescript exterior gave way to a sumptuously appointed den of vice. It was well known that Cobblepot’s joint was the place to get a stiff drink and a good looking girl who most likely wouldn’t give you the clap. On any given night Gotham’s big wigs could be spotted drinking whiskey out of tea cups with their other hand up the skirt of some doll on Cobblepot’s payroll. There were all sorts of speakeasies in Gotham, some for working stiffs, some for swells wanting to take the old lady out for a night on the town. The Iceberg Lounge was strictly a place for gents looking to spend some time with one of Cobblepot’s pro skirts or for sugar daddies to take their side piece out for a night on the town without worrying that it will get back to the wife. There was even a nice little floor show to help set the mood. When the Joker walked in, a line of dancing girls were tapping away to “Let’s Misbehave” while wearing a few scraps of satin that didn’t inhibit any of their natural bounciness.

“Mr. Napier, welcome to the Iceberg Lounge!” Cobblepot approached him with his hand held out to shake. Jack tried to put a grin on his face but he knew it was almost a grimace and shook the man’s hand. They looked like Mutt and Jeff from the funny pages standing there together. The Joker, tall and lanky with a long handsome face across from Cobblepot’s short dumpy form and ugly mug.

“Hello Mr. Cobblepot, please, call me Joker. Everyone does.” Jack replied. “Quite a place you’ve got here.”

“It is indeed, Mr. Joker. I must tell you I’m rather proud of it. You won’t find better booze or prettier girls anywhere else in Gotham City.” Cobblepot puffed his chest out a bit with pride and looked like a bird puffing out his feathers.

“Well you have lot to be proud of. I’m happy that my associates and I can help contribute to such an important part of Gotham’s spirited night life.”

“Oh, you flatter me, Mr. Joker but I must admit I like it. Come with me, I have a private table set up for us.” Cobblepot led him back to a table on a little balcony that provided a good view of the entire place and an excellent view of the stage. Waiters immediately started opening champagne and bringing out caviar and oysters.

“I’ve arranged a little celebration for us.” Cobblepot raised a glass of champagne in a toast and said, “To our new business together. May it be profitable for us both.”

The Joker raised his glass and sipped his champagne. “I’m sure it will be. Thank you for your hospitality”

After a few moments of discussing business a beautiful busty redhead and a sleek looking brunette joined them. They didn’t eat or engage in conversation but seemed to just be there to pretty up the view. At one point Jack felt the brunette slide her bare foot up his calf but he ignored her. This was the part of these "getting to know you" meetings he hated the most. All these speakeasy owners seemed to feel it was their job to feed you, get you drunk and then get you laid. Jack imported more whiskey than anyone on the east coast, he didn’t need help finding liquor. Food wasn’t much of a draw for him either. As for the dolls, it wasn’t that the Joker didn’t like women, he did, but his mind was on business most of the time and these girls were just empty headed babies that just didn’t do it for him. Still he had to accept the offer of a girl often enough that there wasn’t talk of him being a fairy. And with Cobblepot it was more important than usual because Cobblepot was a man that thought with his pecker and he wouldn’t trust a man who didn’t seem to do the same. In Jack’s business life was easier with friends, he had enough enemies. He knew tonight he’d need to take up with one of Cobblepot’s skirts. The brunette was clearly game but not really his type.

He turned his eye to the stage while picking at his dinner. The man next to him ate with gusto and didn’t notice that the Joker’s attention had shifted. The band struck up the opening music of an old tune, “Five Foot Two and Eyes of Blue” and an adorable little thing matching the song title started dancing her heart out. She had silky looking blond hair in finger waves, the aforementioned blue eyes and a nice figure. Good gams for being so short. She was wearing a sparkly light blue dress that came just past her ass and showed off the curve of where it met her thigh when she bounced around just right. Unlike most of the dancers at the Iceberg she’d clearly had some real training and the gift of natural grace. There was a happy light in her eyes and the Joker was surprised to find himself entranced by her.

As the waiters serving the main course finished so did the short little number and the blond left the stage. A kick line of busty beauties took over to the tune of “Yes, Sir, That’s My Baby”. No longer having the blond to entertain him the Joker turned back to his dinner companions. The redhead was feeding Cobblepot little bits of food. The Joker lost what little bit of appetite he had. He pushed his plate away and lit up a cigarette.

“Mr. Joker we have some ice cream for dessert or would you prefer to sample some other sweets? I have all flavors to choose from, just take your pick and you’ll have the delectable little thing all to yourself. Selina here seems to have taken a liking to you already.” He said gesturing to the brunette who put her hand on Jack’s thigh.

“I appreciate the interest, Selina, but I was thinking perhaps the little blond who was just on stage.” The Joker smiled as nicely as he could at Selina, she looked a little afraid of him and moved her hand. His smile scared people sometimes, he had some idea of why.

“Oh.” Cobblepot paused as though trying to think of what to say. “That was Harleen. I think you would be happier with another selection. I hate to trouble you with this but we’ve had complaints about her. Now Pamela here, she’s very popular.” He put his hand on the shoulder of the busty redhead. She smiled seductively at him.

“Complaints? What sort of complaint could a guy have about a cute blond? She got something wrong with her?” The Joker was genuinely curious about this. It could be that Cobblepot just didn’t want to let him know that the girl was laid up with VD or something but if there were actual complaints about her performance as a pro he wanted to hear all about it. It didn’t seem like a very complicated job.

“This is a little embarrassing for me to admit but it’s gotten to the point where she has a bit of a reputation around the city so I suppose there’s no harm telling you. Harleen is well…. she’s a bit odd.”

“Odd how? I sorta like odd myself.” And he did actually, odd might mean interesting and most of these girls were anything but.

“Well she’s not very enthusiastic, just sort of lays there at first… but then, well, she laughs. A mad sort of laugh. It’s very disconcerting. I’ve tried everything. Beaten her, had the other girls try to teach her, even tried drugging her once but that ended violently. Every once in a while someone comes in requesting her thinking they’ll be the fella that’s man enough to get a different reaction out of her but it never works.”

“Why do you keep her around if she’s such a problem?”

“Well she is a good dancer, she does a lot of the choreography and teaches the other girls how to prance around on the stage without falling flat on their faces. And she is very pretty to look at. Like I said, my regulars know she’s not worth the trouble and don’t bother with her. Most other’s believe me when I warn them off.”

The Joker was even more interested in the blond now than he had been before. He wasn’t even sure he was going to put the boots to the girl but he was interested in at least talking to her. “Do you know why they call me the Joker, Mr. Cobblepot?”

“No, sir. I assume you are quite the cut up?”

“Yeah, you could say that.” The Joker laughed at the double meaning of the phrase when one considered his love of knives. “I like to make people laugh, I’d like the chance to make Harleen laugh or at least get a chance to maybe understand why she does.”

“I don’t think it will do any good but you’re welcome to try. Are you sure you won’t reconsider, the things Pamela can do with her mouth are the closest thing to heaven you can imagine.” Cobblepot made one last attempt to change his mind.

“Thanks but I’ll give Harleen a try if you don’t mind.” The Joker made it clear that he was done discussing it.

“Alright, Selina will show you to a room and Harleen will be sent up to you. I hope you won’t blame me for any disappointment you experience. It was a pleasure meeting you at last Mr. Joker, I look forward to our future dealings.” Cobblepot said before turning his attentions to the redhead the Joker had rejected.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains both characters' sad background stories including a general reference to past rape, not detailed, I promise. If you make it through this chapter, the next one is longer and smutty so you have that to look forward to.

The room Selina left him in was luxurious, with a large bed and tasteful décor. More than he had expected to find even in the nicest brothel in Gotham. He sat on the bed and waited. Eventually there was a quiet little knock at the door and before he could say anything the door opened and Harleen walked in. She had changed out of her stage costume and was wearing a simple rose colored silk chemise. She was just as lovely close up as she had appeared on stage but now that she wasn’t performing the happy light in her eyes was replaced by shadows of pain.

Harleen looked at him warily, he wasn’t surprised, if what Cobblepot said was true any guy who wanted to go with her was probably not too nice. He decided to stay quiet and let her approach him on her own, like she was a little fawn in the woods that he wanted to pet. After a minute or so of quiet contemplation she finally came nearer to where he sat on the bed.

“Wow, you must be a pretty big cheese to rate this room! I’ve never been in here before.” She said while sliding her hand over the soft silk bedspread.

“This is my first visit here, I take it your usual room isn’t so fine.” He continued to watch her as she sat on the bed about a foot away from him. She laughed a little and shook her head no. Deciding that maybe he wasn’t so bad she finally looked directly at him.

“Look, mister, I’m not really good at what my friend Red calls ‘the art of seduction’. Is there something particular you want I should do or just, ya know, lie back and think of England?”

“Somehow I don’t think it’s England you’re thinking of, is it?” He gave her a little smile but she frowned back at him.

“No. It’s not.” Clearly she didn’t want to continue this conversation. Tough, she’d aroused his interest and he always got what he wanted.

“I don’t suppose you’d tell me what it is you do think about?” He asked in a persuasive tone.

“Nothin’. I don’t think about nothin’.” She said stubbornly.

“Now that’s not true, oh maybe some of the time but not when you’re laughing. That’s what I want to know about, what makes you laugh?”

“Look, mister, are we gonna do this or are we gonna just sit around talking?” She put her hand on his thigh in what she must have thought was a gesture of interest but it was awkward and it was clear she didn’t mean it. He left her hand there but ignored it.

“Oh I’d just as soon talk, wouldn’t you? I should introduce myself though. If we’re going to be friends we should know each other’s names. I’m Jack Napier, most people call me the Joker.” He smiled his biggest most disconcerting smile at her. She stared into his face, she didn’t look afraid but maybe curious?

“Nice to meet you Mr. Joker. You really just want to talk? That’s a pretty funny thing to come here for.” Harleen smiled back at him.

“Mr. Cobblepot told me your name is Harleen, may I call you Harley?”

“Yeah, sure. I’ve never really liked Harleen.” She scooted a little closer to him on the bed. She seemed relieved by the idea she wasn’t going to have to go to bed with him. He didn’t take it personally.

“Good. Now Harley, you’ve piqued my interest. Do you know why they call me the Joker?” She shook her head no. “Well I love to laugh and make others laugh. I laugh a lot but I especially laugh at times that some people think inappropriate. I’m sure you understand what that is like.”

Her eyes were wide and she nodded at him like she was hypnotized by what he was saying. He picked her hand up off his thigh and held it in his own. She didn’t pull away.

“How about a little deal, Harley? I’ll tell you why I laugh and then you tell me why you do? Now doesn’t that sound fair?” She nodded again and he chuckled at her. Before he began he wondered why he was sitting here telling this little hoofer his life story, telling her things he’d never told anyone else. It wasn’t just because she was going to do the same in turn. There was something deep inside him that seemed to recognize a sameness deep inside her. A kindred spirit perhaps.

“My father was a drunk. Not just a drunk, a mean violent drunk. I don’t remember a time before the beatings started and the way he beat on me was nothing compared to the violence my mother experienced. I hated him. I only remember ever hating him. With mother I vacillated between loving her and wanting to protect her and hating her for putting us in the path of this monster.” Harley was listening attentively and moved closer to the Joker, their outer thighs were now touching. “Well one day when I was thirteen we were walking home from church and a fight broke out between my parents. When we had returned to our own property it turned physical and soon Mother was laying on the ground unconscious or dead, I couldn’t tell which. I don’t know if I was feeling I was old enough to act like a man or if it was just seeing what appeared to be the final demise of the only person I loved but I picked up the nearest tool at hand. It was a long iron bar, a crow bar. While my father was leaning over Mother, checking for signs of life I took the opportunity to clobber him over the head with the bar. I didn’t stop until I saw gray matter. From the very first whack I finally saw everything so clearly, Harley. I saw this life for the joke it is and I started to laugh. I laughed and laughed until I thought I’d be sick. My sides hurt for a week after. And now it turns out that whenever I have to deliver a bit of forceful persuasion or discipline to someone, well I just can’t help myself, I bust a gut laughing. People think I’m very odd but I think I’m just seeing things a little more accurately than they are able to.”

She was hanging on his every word now and her eyes were wet and shiny. Tears for him or for herself? He wasn’t sure which but he pulled her hand up to his mouth and kissed it gently. She smiled at him again and then surprised him by planting a soft kiss on his lips. They sat there smiling at each other like a couple of saps but then her face clouded over. She must have realized it was her turn to spill.

“Shall I try guessing?” He offered, she looked at him blankly and shrugged.

“Your father?” A little head shake and no change in her face; she’d never known dear old dad would be his guess.

“Your mother?” Another head shake but something passed over her face. Mommy hadn’t done anything but she hadn’t stopped whatever did happen. That left an obvious option.

“Stepfather then, was it?” Her face crumpled in pain for the briefest moment but then she raised her head higher and nodded.

“Did he beat you or was it worse?”

“You name it, he did it. No one did anything to stop it. For a long time I just took it but then one day it was sorta like you said, things got kinda clear on me and I couldn’t help but laugh. He didn’t like that one bit but he’d just beat me harder for it so I kept it up hoping one day he’d beat me hard enough he’d just kill me.” Interesting. Did she still laugh now hoping one day a John would finally do the job her stepfather didn't?

“How’d you get away Harley?” He knew now why she laughed but he wanted to whole story. He felt sure if she didn’t tell him now he’d never know and for some reason he had to know it all.

“I was fourteen. I didn’t know nothin’ about nothin’ but soon my Mama figured out that I’d been knocked up. She was upset the neighbors might find out. No thought to how it happened, just get rid of it, so they took me to see a man in the city. He did something that hurt and told me I wouldn’t have the baby. A week later and I was sick, real sick. Sick enough I might die, so they took me to the hospital. I got better but there was some sort of infection, the doctors told me I wouldn’t be able to have babies. Then some lady from the county came to talk to me about how it was I was fourteen and had been to see this man in the first place. After that they wouldn’t let anyone see me. It was the first time he wasn’t anywhere around to watch over me. Sneaking out of the hospital was no trick at all. I wandered here and there for a while but eventually ended up at the Iceberg. It’s not so bad. I like the other girls and Ozzie’s ok most of the time.” By wandered here and there he assumed she meant that she had begged, stolen and then eventually sold herself just to make sure she never had to go back. He noticed there were no tears in her eyes now. Perhaps they had been for him. Why did she have tears for his story and not for her own?

“Does it make you sad that you won’t ever have children?” He asked, still strangely interested in everything about her. She snorted with laughter at his question.

“Are you kidding? Who’d want to bring kids into this lousy world?” She scoffed. He couldn’t blame her, she certainly knew how ugly this world could be to a beautiful little girl. Now that he knew her story, he should be satisfied but he found himself not wanting to leave the company of this doll. He’d never been so unsure of his motivations before but this girl had a strange effect on him. Surprisingly he liked it and he wanted more.


	3. Chapter 3

“So now I know why you haven’t really worked out as one of Cobblepot’s girls but I’m wondering, Harley, have you ever tried getting off with someone who got you hot?” ‘Interesting Jack, just asking for a friend are we?’ he thought to himself. She didn’t answer right away but it was clear she was thinking over his question.

“I don’t know that anyone ever has gotten me hot, not a client anyway. My friend Red, well she’s a little pushy and sometimes I let her, ya know…I mean I could take it or leave it but it makes her real happy. She is my best friend, it seems the least I can do.” She blushed a little at her confession. If he was unsure of his intentions before, the thought of her with another woman’s face buried between her legs certainly cleared things right up for him.

“So you and Cobblepot’s pet redhead practice a little mutual pearl diving, do you?” He leered at her and she nodded. The Joker was no longer going to pretend his interest in this girl was just curiosity about her story. She was a real beauty and he wanted her as badly as he’d ever wanted any skirt. “Think you’d be willing to let me give it a try?”

She looked surprised. “You mean you wanna… with me? That’s not really something clients ever ask to do. At least not with me.”

“Hey, I thought you and I were friends now?” He asked with a charming smile. “Give me a chance and if you don’t like it, I’ll stop. Promise.”

“Ok, but if I start laughing or anything just don’t get mad at me. I know guys don’t like it when you laugh at them in bed but I can’t always help it and I think you’d be a real dangerous fella if you were angry.” She still looked a little unsure.

“Don’t worry, baby, I’m a pretty confident guy, there’s no chance you’ll make me feel insecure. If you laugh I promise I won’t get angry, though I might laugh right along with you and not everyone likes the sound of my laugh.” She smiled at him then, their shared crazy habit making her feel safe with him. The Joker was not used to making anyone feel safe.

He stood up and took off his coat, tie, shirt and shoes and laid down on the bed. She looked confused for a minute so he pulled her up to straddle his chest. It seemed to finally click in her head what he wanted. The Joker was no Freud but he figured this baby was due a chance to be in control a little. She pulled her chemise up over her head and he got his first view of her body. Her skin was creamy silk tipped with pale pink rosebud nipples and a golden blond thatch of hair over her honeypot. She slid forward a bit and spread her thighs for him. Her pussy was so pink and pretty it looked like a confection. He used one hand to spread her outer lips and began enthusiastically exploring her with his tongue.

From the first swirl of his tongue around her pearl she was moaning and enthusiastic. Not at all what Cobblepot had led him to expect. Of course the goons that made up the clientele of the Iceberg Lounge would just go around trying to shove their dicks into a girl without any warm up. The Joker was not a man who spent much time pursuing carnal pleasures but if he was going to do something, he was going to excel at it. When he pushed his tongue into her she cried out and spread her legs further, greedy for him to push as far into her as he could. She was a flexible little thing, bent so far back she was practically lying down on him in an effort to give him more access to her. He could feel her occasionally brush against his hardening length and moaned a little himself. The hum of his vocalization must have felt good because she started crying out for more. With a smug little chuckle he licked up her slit and moved his tongue back up to her swollen nub. She was so wet now he could feel her cream dripping down his chin. He pushed into her with a finger and used his mouth to suck and lick her clit, increasing her cries. She started wiggling around and thrusting against his finger. He pulled out of her and then pushed back in with two fingers this time. Dames were all a little different when it came to the tunnel of love and he could feel that Harley had that pronounced spongey area a few inches in that in his experience would drive a girl wild if pressed and rubbed. So that’s what he did while still lapping at her with his tongue. He could feel the muscles of her thighs trembling against him and her breathing was becoming irregular. Her panting breaths and little squeaks of pleasure were having quite an effect on his now throbbing erection. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been so turned on. He focused that energy into pleasuring her. What drove him to prove to this poor little bunny that someone could be good to her? He had no idea but it was now a point of pride to do just that. He curled his fingers up and sucked harder at her pearl until he heard her scream out in ecstasy. Whatever else Harley was feeling it wasn’t the need to laugh as her back arched and she rode out her orgasm on his face.

He stopped moving when she did and waited for her body to relax before he pulled his fingers away. They were wet with her juices and he sucked them clean, savoring her taste. She was still breathing hard and didn’t move off of him, he liked that she felt relaxed with him, at least for the moment. He sat up a bit, she weighed almost nothing and didn’t impede his ability to move at all. Her legs were still up by his head so he took one in his hand and started nibbling the inside of her ankle. He continued along her calf but when he got to the inside of her knee, she started giggling and squirming around.

“Ticklish?” He asked looking down at her smiling face. She nodded and then started squeaking as he went back to his nibbling. Her giggles weren’t disconcerting at all, they were like little bells.

“I knew I could get a laugh out of you, and a very pretty laugh it is.” He said, pausing his nibbling again. She pulled her legs away and scrambled to flip over so she was now laying with her chest against his and her legs were on either side of his waist. Her silky skin against his was almost too pleasurable to bear. She nuzzled her face against his neck and let out a large contented sigh.

“Wow, that was so.. I mean it was really… wow.” She mumbled as though still slightly dazed. He laughed at her and stroked her hair.

“I take it I measured up ok next to your gal pal?” He wasn’t kidding when he said he was a confident guy but it was still nice to hear a good review.

“And how! I didn’t realize it would be so different but it sure was, Mr. J. ” He didn’t bother to stop the smug grin that covered his face. For some reason he wished the redhead was here to witness Harley’s testimonial.

“Mr. J? I like that. You’re a real cute kid, Harley.” He felt her smile against his neck and then she lifted her head up and kissed him tentatively. He returned her kiss enthusiastically but he could tell she was unsure of herself. He felt pretty confident that it wasn’t the kissing that made her nervous, he was sure Red liked her to practice that as well. She was trying to repay him for the pleasure he’d given her by letting him know it was ok to go all the way with her. Only he could tell it wasn’t really. She was just being nice.

“Not like this, Doll.” He said pulling away from her kiss and looking her in the eyes. They were such a pretty shade of blue, like two big blueberries.

“How do you want it then?” She asked, thinking probably he wanted her to use her mouth or hands.

“You misunderstand, Harley. I want to fuck you, I won’t lie, but not like this. Someday you’re going to want it, really want it from me. Until then, I’ll wait.” She looked down at his chest and played with the hair there.

“Mr. J, I don’t think that’s very likely. You’ve been really swell with me, I just wanted to say thank you. Won’t you let me?”

“If you don’t ever really want me, then ok, I can live with that. But that’s how it’s got to be. You can thank me another way though.” He knew what he was about to do was crazy and he had no idea why he was doing it really except he wanted to and when he wanted something he didn’t stop until he got it.

“Sure, Mr. J.” She looked at him with curiosity.

“Answer another question for me?” She nodded a little but looked confused. “If you could have anything or do anything what would it be?”

“You mean like a fur coat or go to Paris or something?” She was thinking this was about some sort of gift, a payoff.

“Sure though that’s thinking small. Would you want money, power? Anything at all, what would it be?” He thought he knew her answer but he wanted to be sure. She laid her head back down on his shoulder and thought for a couple of minutes.

“I guess I’d want to be free. Free from everything really.” She answered quietly.

“Free from everything is dead, Harley. I’m not ready for you to be dead just yet. Would free from most things work for you?”

“Sure, I guess so. But that’s just crazy talk. You don’t need to get me anything, Mr. J. Maybe you could just come by and talk to me sometimes. You’re the only one who seems like they really understand. Even Red don’t seem to get me most the time.” He liked hearing that more than he probably should have.

“I know I don’t have to do anything for you, Harley and I’d love to talk to you again but I’m afraid I won’t be coming back here. I’m a busy guy, can’t spend all my time in juice joints and cathouses. No, I think you’ll just have to come away with me so we can find time to talk again in the future.” She sat up and looked at him like he was crazy.

“What do you mean come away with you?” With a skeptical tone.

“Well, you leave here and live with me. You can do whatever you want, mostly. I’ll provide for you and you can do just what you like. I hope spending time with me will be what you like to do but if not...” He shrugged his shoulders.

“I could mostly do what I want, huh? What’s mostly mean?”

“Mostly means no running around with any other fellas. Or dolls either. You don’t have to be with me but I don’t want you with anyone else either. Romantically speaking that is. At the very least I’d like it to look like I’ve got a hotsy totsy baby like you all to myself.” He grinned at her. She still looked unsure.

“Is this on the level? I mean even if it is, what makes you think Cobblepot would let you take me anywhere?”

“You’ve got the wrong end of the stick, Harley. Cobblepot does what I want or Cobblepot gets bumped off.” He said, explaining just how the power dynamic around here worked. She looked at him in awe, perhaps it had never occurred to her that anyone could defy Oswald Cobblepot. It seemed to have the effect of her finally taking him seriously.

“Would I have to love you?” She looked down at her hands.

“No, do what you like. You have my permission to if you decide you’d like to try it out.” He laughed a little and she looked up to see that he was teasing her and smiled.

“Do you think you’d love me?” Now that was the question wasn’t it? Why was he doing this? Was there some secret part of him that was hoping she could make him love her?

“Probably not. I’ve never loved anyone before.” That was true, he hadn’t ever really loved anyone except maybe his mother.

“You ever invite anyone else to come live with you and not want anything in return before?” She gave him a knowing smile. Yeah. She was no dumb Dora. Time to change the subject.

“So do you want to come with me or not? I can’t spend all night hanging around here. We’ve got a shipment coming in tonight and I need to check in with the boys and make sure it goes smoothly.” He knew he sounded bothered by her question but he couldn’t help it. Why did this doll have such an effect on him?

“Yeah, why not? What’ve I got to lose?” She popped a quick kiss onto his cheek and then jumped out of the bed and pulled her chemise back on. He couldn’t help admiring her naked form before it disappeared. If nothing else this girl seemed to give a real boost to his sex drive. He wasn’t sure if that was a good thing yet.

“I’ll tell Cobblepot what our plans are. You get dressed and get anything you want to take with you and I’ll meet you at the door. Be quick though.” After his instructions she hurried to the door but stopped and turned to give him a little wave before she left the room. He took his time getting dressed. If Cobblepot was going to give him trouble he’d just as soon not have to wait long for Harley afterward. ‘Time to see a man about a girl’, he thought as he left the Iceberg Lounge’s VIP room.


	4. Chapter 4

Rocco was standing guard outside the room as expected. The Joker instructed him to pull the car around while he went looking for Cobblepot. It didn’t take much searching before he ran into Selina and instructed her to take him to her boss. She argued a bit, saying that Cobblepot had retired to his private suite but a quick flash of a nasty looking knife convinced her it was in her own best interest to take him wherever he wanted. He gave a loud knock before he walked into Cobblepot’s suite unannounced. He figured it was better not to give the man time to gather his wits or guns about him. Really there shouldn’t be any trouble but you just never knew. He found Cobblepot in bed with the redhead, Pamela if he recalled correctly. The girl certainly seemed popular around here. Upon seeing the Joker in his room Cobblepot jumped out of bed and looked confused about what was the right tone to take with the man who had interrupted his fun. He seemed to finally decide on politeness.

“Mr. Joker, I’m sorry if you found Harleen not to your liking. We can certainly replace her with another girl. If you could remove yourself from my suite from a moment I’ll dress and be right with you.” The portly man was standing there in his shirt and some baggy striped boxers, still wearing a top hat. The sight was too much for the Joker and he found himself doubled over with laughter. This seemed to confuse Cobblepot further and frightened the naked girl in his bed who let out a little scream. It took a couple of minutes but he somehow managed to get himself under control. He needed to get out of here quick before he started a laugh he couldn’t stop without a little bloodshed.

“You misunderstand why I’m here, Ozzie. Harley’s coming home with me, just thought I should let you know.”

“I’m confused sir, you’d like to take her home for the evening? We don’t normally allow the girls to leave but I suppose for you we could make an exception…”Cobblepot held his hands up a little as though not sure how to proceed with this odd request.

“She’s not coming home for the night, she’s moving in. For keeps. She doesn’t work for you anymore. That’s not going to be a problem is it, Cobblepot?” The Joker gave him what could only be described as a deadly grin.

“If you are offering to buy her from me, well we don’t usually do that sort of thing here.” He was clearly calculating what Harleen was worth in his mind.

“I’m not buying anything, you see any dough in my hand? She’s a person and she’s decided she doesn’t want to stay here anymore so she’s coming with me. And you don’t have anything else to say about that do you?” Oswald finally seemed to get the picture. He shook his head no. Jack turned to leave.

“Wait!” It was the redhead calling from the bed. He turned back around and waited for her to go on. “You’re going to be good to her, aren’t you? Harleen’s had a hard time of it, she deserves better.”

Before the Joker could reply he heard a little voice behind him. “Gee Red, that’s real nice of you. Don’t worry about me, I’m gonna be just great.”

She walked over to the bed and hugged her friend. The redhead clung to Harley in a way that was starting to bother the Joker. He was turning real possessive of his little doll.

“Alright, enough with the schmaltz, let’s hit the road.” The Joker said with an irritable tone in his voice.

“Sure, Mr. J. Let’s go! Bye Red, bye Ozzie.” And with that she turned and left with her new benefactor.

When they got outside the club, Rocco was waiting in the Joker’s car. “Is that your car?” Harley asked excitedly.

“Of course it is, get in.” He opened the door to his two tone purple Isotta Fraschini Phaeton.

“You sure like purple, don’t cha!” She said as she wiggled around on the dark purple leather seats of the car.

“You could say that.” He chuckled and straightened the lapels of his purple suit. Sure, he had a favorite color. She just giggled at him and then cozied up next to him. Harley stood out amongst all the purple in her red dress and red hat.

Her face lit up with excitement as their car sped through the streets of Gotham. When Rocco let them out in front of the modern forty story building he lived in Harley’s eyes widened and she tilted her head up trying to take it all in. She didn’t say anything but just looked at everything in wonder as they walked through the Art Deco lobby and went up to his penthouse apartment. When they entered her new home she immediately went to the balcony doors and opened them to look out at the city view. The Joker couldn’t help but laugh at her as she ran around from room to room looking at all the luxurious features of his thoroughly modern apartment. He felt like Daddy Warbucks leading Little Orphan Harley around the place. Finally he put the small bag of meager belongings she had brought with her down on a bed in the room next to his.

“Welcome home, kid. I wasn’t joking earlier when I said I had a shipment to check on so I’ll just leave you here to get settled in and get some rest. I’ll see you tomorrow, ok?” He turned to walk away without giving her a chance to answer him. This night had been very confusing for him, he was feeling such a pull to this girl he didn’t want to leave her side and that worried him. It seemed best to get out of here as quickly as he could, to put a little distance between them.

“Wait, Mr. J!” He turned back to her. “Can’t I come with you?”

“You want to come with me? I’m just going to a warehouse out by the docks. It’s pretty boring if everything is going well and if not then it’s pretty dangerous. Wouldn’t you rather just go to sleep?”

“Go to sleep? It’s barely past midnight, I can’t go to sleep yet. And I don’t want to stay here all by myself. Can’t I please come?” She smiled at him prettily.

What had he thought was going to happen? He’d bring the dame home and she’d just entertain herself; let him show her off around town occasionally and otherwise keep quiet? Of course not, he’d brought home a big bag of trouble for himself. Just a whole lot of hassle wrapped up in the prettiest little package he’d ever seen.

“Okay, but no complaining that you’re bored.” Her face lit up and she ran to him and threw herself into his arms with a happy squeak. He couldn’t help but laugh at her.

She seemed to get a big kick out of riding around in the car which wasn’t much surprise, purple or not it was an awful lot of horsepower. The straight-8 engine purred like a kitten and Harley was purring right along with it. Everything was fine at the warehouse, no trouble with the coppers and the crates of brown were all accounted for. The Joker did take extra care to check things out which provided him with an opportunity to show off the blond clinging to his arm. He enjoyed the envious looks the boys were giving him. That was new, most people just looked at him with fear, sometimes disgust. Maybe Harley could be useful to him.

When they got back to the apartment it was late and the Joker sent Harley off to bed. He tried to spend some time going over some plans for a new route through Canada that looked promising for smuggling a larger supply of liquor into the country but he couldn’t keep his mind on it and ended up just getting in bed himself. Lying in his large bed alone in his purple silk pajamas his thoughts turned to Harley. At first he was just trying to figure out what he was doing dragging this doll around with him. He couldn’t come up with any way that this ended well for him. Eventually his thoughts left the practicalities of his situation and drifted to Harley herself. Remembering the sight of her naked body earlier and the taste and smell of her when he was between her legs got him hard again. It had been a long time since he’d bothered to jerk his own crankshaft but there was no ignoring his situation and he couldn’t see any other way out. He untied the drawstring of his pajama pants and pulled out his erection. He’d barely had a chance to start stroking himself when he heard his door open.

“Mr. J?” He heard Harley whisper in an effort to see if he was still awake. The moon shining through his window lit up the outline of her curvy little body, she was standing there in just a chemise. He felt his cock jump in his hand.

“What is it, Harley?” His voice sounded strained and awkward, he cleared his throat and tried again. “Can’t you sleep, kid?”

“No, it’s sort of scary being alone in that big room. Can I sleep in here with you?”

He sighed and tucked himself back into his pants. “Sure, come on in.”

She ran over and jumped onto the bed as though she was afraid something under the bed might grab her ankle if she lingered near the sides for too long. “Gee, you sure have a big bed. I’ll just sleep way over here and you’ll never even know I was around, I won’t bother you a bit.”

“Good night, Harley.” Sure, he’d just lie over here, completely unbothered by how badly he wanted to give her a tumble.

“Night, Mr. J.”

The Joker found himself lying in the bed, trying to will his dick to settle down and making an effort not to scoot closer to the center of the bed to be nearer to Harley. He had a king size bed but at the moment he was regretting that choice. Finally the sound of her deep and even breathing had a hypnotic effect on him and put him to sleep as well. He was never one for a lot of sleep so he woke up a few hours later. Jack didn’t remember ever having felt so warm and cozy when he slept. He tried to move and realized why he was warm, he was wrapped up in a little over five feet of cuddly blond. She had found her way over to his side in the night and was clinging to him like a limpet. He moved his arm so he could put it around her and instead of getting up like he normally would, he laid there and stroked the smooth skin of her shoulder and arm. He’d say this dame was making him go soft but damned if he wasn’t hard again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tune in next time to see if the Joker finally gets some relief or if blue balls really can kill a fella.


	5. Chapter 5

Eventually the urge to take care of his erection overcame his desire to lie in bed petting Harley’s soft skin like some sort of sap. He got into the shower and with the hot water running over his skin he started stroking himself, hoping not to be interrupted again. Actually if she interrupted him now he was just going to grab her and fuck her, he was pushed past the point of caring about her emotional scars. Fortunately he was left alone and came after just a few pumps like he was some kind of kid exploring himself for the first time. He wasn’t pathetic enough to call out her name when he finished but he was far enough gone to have been thinking it. Afterwards, he felt better, his head felt clearer and he hoped that meant he could actually get some work done today without thinking about Harley constantly.

The morning flew by as he had various meetings with his underlings, some paperwork to fill out and made some phone calls to suppliers. Bernie, who managed the low level guys, came to him to meet about a possible prohibition agent disguised as a know nothing goon. The guy was probably just some dummy but he was acting dumb in some ways that were pretty suspicious. The Joker made arrangements with Bernie to keep an eye on him. If things kept looking hinky, the Joker and his knives would give the guy a thorough questioning that would solve all their problems. Apparently Harley was a late sleeper because he didn’t see any sign of her until noon. She came slinking into his office wearing nothing but her chemise and his purple silk smoking jacket that was long enough to be a robe on her small frame.

“Jesus Christ, Harley!” He exclaimed when he saw her, she might as well have ‘Property of Joker” stamped across her. He liked it.

“What?” She looked worried she done something wrong. “Should I not come in here?”

“No, you’re fine, you just surprised me. A good surprise though.” He gave her a reassuring smile and she returned it with a big smile of her own.

He was sitting at his desk but he was done with anything he really needed to do there. Before he could get up and go over to her, he found himself with a lap full of Harley. She put her arms around his neck and gave him a soft kiss. With his hand on the side of her face he pulled her closer and deepened the kiss. Unlike the night before she was very responsive, passionate even. He didn’t know if it was just that she knew he wasn’t going to force himself on her or if it was that her interest in him was growing, perhaps both. He trailed his hand down her jaw and then onto her throat. It fit so nicely in his hand, he couldn’t help but apply a little pressure, not enough to hurt her, just a little squeeze. He moaned at the thought of having his cock buried in her and his hand still squeezing her throat. Perhaps his kiss got too aggressive or maybe he was applying too much pressure to her neck, whatever it was he felt the exact moment he lost her. She didn’t stop kissing him but her mouth went slack and she was just submitting to whatever he did. Like a rabbit going limp in the jaws of a dog, hoping that by playing dead it might be put down and have a chance to hop away. He dropped his hand and pulled out of her embrace.

“We should go out and find you something to eat, I don’t keep much around in the kitchen.” He looked down into her face. Her cheeks were flushed and there were unshed tears in her eyes.

“I’m sorry.” She said quietly. “I want to be with you, I really do. But I just…”

“It’s ok, kid. Like I said last night, you do what you want. Now, how about some food?” He actually felt a little hungry himself. Normally he subsisted on plates of sandwiches that Rocco would leave on his desk whenever he remembered that the boss should probably eat something. The Joker never really noticed things like hunger when he was working. Harley seemed to have an invigorating effect on all of his appetites.

Harley scurried off to dress and when she returned the tears were gone. She was wearing her red dress and red cloche hat again, it occurred to him that a girl like her probably only owned one or two dresses, both of them cheap. He’d have to make arrangements for her to be completely outfitted to look the part of the Joker’s moll. He dressed sharp, she needed to as well. He placed a call before they left to arrange everything.

They had lunch in a small café where the Joker kept Harley laughing through the entire meal. He told her dirty jokes, did a few sleight of hand magic tricks for her, and even juggled the silverware when the waiter wasn’t looking. He loved hearing her laugh and she was a wonderful audience, everything he did sent her into hysterics. They made quite a spectacle of themselves but the owners of the café knew who he was, no one was going to tell them to pipe down. After they ate he took her to the motion pictures. The Joker didn’t generally make time for leisure but he never missed a Buster Keaton picture. By the time the movie ended all the awkwardness of their encounter in his office was forgotten and they strolled down the street together arm in arm.

“Gee, that Buster Keaton sure is swell. A girl could really go for a guy like him.” Harley said with a little sigh.

“Buster Keaton? Is that what’s happened to the romantic dreams of the flapper since Valentino kicked off last year?”

“Aww, it don’t matter how good looking a guy is if he can’t make you laugh.” She looked up at him with a mischievous smile. He couldn’t help puffing up a little with pride, he’d made her laugh all afternoon.

“Still, he’s kind of short, isn’t he?” The comedian couldn’t have been much taller than Harley herself, the Joker was easily a foot taller than both of them.

“There could be some advantage to not having to pull out a step ladder every time you want to plant one on your fella.” She was clearly teasing him.

“Oh well if that’s the problem!” He stopped walking and got down on his knees in front of her. With their height difference she only needed to tilt her head down a little to kiss him now and happily she did so. It was so sweet and romantic the Joker could feel his stomach turning but he didn’t want her to ever stop.

“Hey buddy, go in the alley if you’re going to throw a fuck in that quiff.” Some lousy bum suggested as he walked by. Oh good, just the thing to cut the sweetness of this moment for the Joker.

“Excuse me for a minute, Doll.” The Joker stood and ran up to the bum with the loose kisser. He jerked the unsuspecting man into the same alley he’d suggested Harley and the Joker move into and started kicking and punching him. The guy hardly even knew what hit him before he was down for the count. The Joker pulled a knife out and got ready to kill the jerk but looked around first to make sure he wasn’t being observed. He found Harley standing at the entrance to the alley watching him with wide eyes.

“Look, Harley, I’m not going to lie to you, I’m a pretty rough guy. Sorry if it upsets you but he had it coming as far as I’m concerned. Why don’t you just turn around and wait for me out on the street.” He hoped she wouldn’t be too upset by what she’d just seen.

“Can I do it?” She asked, staring at the knife in his hand.

“Can you do what?” Surely she wasn’t asking what he thought.

“You’re gonna kill him, right? Can I be the one to do it?” She looked from the knife up to the Joker, she looked serious.

“You ever kill anyone before?” He couldn’t wait to hear the answer to this.

“No, but you could show me what to do.” The Joker’s heart started racing a little. She wanted him to show her how to kill someone. His mouth curled into an evil grin.

“Sure I can, baby. Come over here and take Daddy’s knife.” She hurried over to him and took the knife from his hand.

“What should I do?” She asked innocently.

“It’d probably be easiest for you to slice his throat but that can get pretty messy. We’re short on time and don’t want to attract attention so we’re gonna put it in his heart. It’s fast and doesn’t make much mess. The only problem is you have to get through a lot of muscle and past the ribs so you have to be able to put a little strength into it. I’ll help.” The Joker had felt a lot of things when killing a person. He’d felt joy, mirth, and rage; even sadness once or twice, but he had never felt turned on by it until now. As soon as he put his hand around her smaller one and moved it to where she needed to insert the knife he felt himself start to harden.

“Shouldn’t it be over more?” She asked. Good, she was thinking about what she was doing and paying attention.

“No, it’s closer to the center than most people think. Trust me, this is where you want to shove the knife in.”

The Joker helped her push the knife past the ribs and into the heart. She was doing pretty well on her own but it was a bit of a struggle for her. With a little practice she’d be great at it. He pulled the knife out and cleaned it off on the guy’s jacket. He turned her around to look at him, checking for signs of shock or panic but she looked ok so he dragged her out of the alley and they walked calmly away from the scene of the crime. When they’d passed a few blocks he pulled her into another alley. Harley looked confused about what they were doing here but before she could ask him about it he grabbed the back of her neck and pulled her up into a passionate kiss. He wrapped his other hand around her waist and pressed her body as close to his as he could get it. She responded by pushing her sweet little tongue into his mouth and wrapping her arms around his neck. Whatever she was feeling this time, it didn’t scare her and she didn’t pull away.

Jack had never understood why so many guys had a thing for virgins. Maybe he was biased because he lost his own virginity to a pro when he was young or maybe it was because his only experience with deflowering someone was one of the worst sexual experiences of his life but he just didn’t get the appeal. He always assumed guys who liked it either lacked the tool or skills to get the job done with a girl that knew what’s what. While he still had no desire to fuck a virgin, he maybe understood those guys a little better if for them the thrill of introducing a girl to sex was anything like he was feeling from having introduced Harley to murder. He knew exactly what he’d be thinking about next time he jerked it in the shower; her big blue eyes looking longingly at his knife and asking so sweetly, “Can I do it?”

The Joker pulled away from their kiss before things could go any further. He didn’t know where her head was after her first experience with killing a man and he didn’t want to ruin the moment by pushing her too far. Still as she stared up at him with slightly dazed eyes, her small hands clinging to his lapels, it felt like something had shifted between them. Something good, something full of promise.


	6. Chapter 6

When they arrived back at the penthouse the dressmakers he had arranged for had been waiting for over an hour. It didn’t matter, no one was going to complain to the Joker. When he explained to Harley why they were there and that he would be working in his office while she was measured and chose her wardrobe she just nodded her head at him. He walked away towards his office but turned back to look at her. She’d been so quiet since they killed the man in the alley he was a little worried about her. She was ignoring the dressmaker who was speaking to her and staring at him with a sad look on her face. She looked like it hurt her to have him leave her even for an hour. Jack wasn’t sure how he felt about that but he gave her a smile and a wink anyway. She tried to pull the corners of her mouth up but didn’t get far. He continued on to his office, there was no way he was going to sit there and help her choose dresses and hats.

He found plenty to keep himself occupied while Harley was busy with the dressmakers. The Joker was always looking for new ways to expand his business. Right now he had as big a piece of Gotham as he could get without getting more booze in from Canada. With his mind on smuggling routes and plotting new ways to bring in product he didn’t notice Harley had entered the room until she put her hand on his shoulder.

“All done with the wardrobe? Not that I don’t approve of this.” He fingered the silk of the chemise that she had come into his office wearing. Apparently she’d just decided not to get dressed again after the seamstress was done measuring her. That was alright by him.

“All done. I hope you don’t mind, I picked a whole lot of stuff. The lady kept saying it was what you wanted me to do.” She sat down across his lap with her legs dangly off the arm rest of the chair and started playing with the knot of his tie. If it weren’t for the serious look on her face he’d think she just came in to give him a little teasing.

“What’s on your mind, doll? Bothered about what happened earlier?” It seemed obvious that having now had time to think she probably regretted her actions. He had never had that feeling personally but he knew it was fairly common with other people. He just hoped she wouldn’t make a big thing of it.

“No, not bothered. Kind of curious I guess. I thought maybe you could explain some things to me.” She was right, he could teach a course on killing bums in an alley. Or anywhere else for that matter. He hadn’t gotten ahead in life by hard work alone.

“Sure, ask anything you want.”

“You’ve killed a lot of folks, haven’t you?” She kept staring at his tie instead of his face, playing with the knot until she had loosened it.

“Sure I have. I told you about how I killed my old man, I never really stopped after that.” She nodded a little.

“And when you kill someone is it normal… I mean is it ok if it doesn’t make you feel sad? Is it ok to kinda feel good about it?” She raised her eyes up to his now. There was something in them, a sort of heat. She didn’t want to know if it was ok to feel good about killing some jerk who had it coming. She wanted to know if it was ok to get turned on by it.

“What an interesting question.” He gave her a knowing look and she blushed a little but she didn’t look away. He started running his hand up the silky skin of one well-shaped calf. “When I kill someone I usually feel pretty good about it. Most people I meet have it coming. But today…”

He looked down at where his hand had stopped at her knee and, as though responding to an unasked question, she parted her legs a little so he could continue his path up her inner thigh. He looked back into her eyes which were now half closed in pleasure as he teased his way up to the area where her thigh and body met.

“Today I felt something new, something very exciting.” He continued his gentle stroking on the small patch of golden curls between her legs. She parted her legs further. He caressed her outer lips, keeping all his touches light and sultry. He didn’t want her shying away from him again.

“You never felt that before, not with any other girls you maybe killed someone with?” Her eyes were completely closed now and her voice sounded distracted. Still it was obvious what she was hinting at.

“I’ve never killed anyone with any other girls, Harley. Just you. It was special.” She opened her eyes and looked into his.

“It was special to me too.” She said solemnly. “Do you think maybe we could do it again sometime?”

“As often as you want, Doll. There’s always someone in this town that would be better off in the ground.” His gentle petting seemed to be yielding results, he could feel her wetness starting to reach his fingers.

He decided he could afford a little boldness now and slipped two fingers just past her outer lips and against her slick opening. She moved her left leg onto his desk, opening herself up fully to him, he resisted the urge to just plunge into her. Instead he slid a trail of her cream up to her clit and started making slow circles with his fingers. She wiggled around a little on his lap, at first he thought it was in reaction to his ministrations but soon he realized she was specifically rubbing against his hardening length.

“Can I see it?” She asked innocently. ‘See what?’ he thought for a moment but then she gave another purposeful rub against him. Seemed like baby was ready to play a little herself.

“Sure, if you’d like.” He tried to sound nonchalant. He was disappointed when she shifted away from his hand to straddle his lap and undo his pants. ‘Wait a minute pal, think about it before you complain’, ok maybe not too disappointed that she was pulling out his dick rather than letting him finger her.

“It’s pretty big!” She said with a little surprise in her voice. His cock surged up as it hardened further at her comment.

“Is it really? I had no idea.” He said casually. She rolled her eyes and stuck her tongue out at him. He started laughing but then she was touching him and his laughter died instantly. She was gently ghosting her fingers over the head and then ran one finger down the length with a feathery touch. It was almost more frustrating to have her barely touching him than not touching him at all. He resisted the urge to grab her hand and wrap it around his cock.

“I like it.” She said simply. Now he was laughing again.

“You and me both, kid.” He slid his fingers back between her legs while he let her poke and prod at him in exploration. Nothing bad could come from her taking a liking to his member. He slid two fingers into her opening and then let his thumb slide back and forth over her clit. Maybe he’d gone too far because in her excitement she lost her interest in his body. That wasn’t the direction he was hoping things would go in.

“Harley, do you trust me?”

She didn’t hesitate at all. “Yes, Mr. J, I trust you.”

He removed his fingers from her body and picked her up and turned her around so her back was against his chest and her feet were resting on the edge of his desk. He shifted in his chair a bit and reached down to move his erection so it was centered between her legs. If she was worried he would go too far she didn’t show it, she let him move her body however he would like. He pulled her outer lips open gently and pushed his cock along her slick folds up to her already swollen clit.

“Oh, Mr. J!” She cried out with a little squeal. She threw her arms back to circle his neck and tilted her head back they could share a kiss.

He kept thrusting against her, she was so slippery and wet. He knew he could move just a little and on the upstroke he could slide right into her, feel her walls gripping him, be immersed in her heat. It was difficult to resist but there was a sort of terrible pleasure in not doing it. Being so tempted, wanting her so badly and not giving in. Maybe he was going crazy but he sort of liked how careful he had to be with Harley, being cautious was making him appreciate every bit of pleasure that much more. He was starting to appreciate it too much, he was afraid he was going to pop off before he got Harley to the finish line. He pulled away from her kisses and looked down at where their bodies were connected. Seeing his cock sliding up and poking out from between her golden curls was not helping to slow him down any. He pulled her chemise further up her body and moved his hands to her breasts, they weren’t particularly large but they were nice firm handfuls. With slow flicks he brought her nipples to hard little peaks that he proceeded to pull and pinch, exciting them both even more. Harley was already making a lot of noise; squeaks, squeals, moans, she wasn’t a quiet girl. Now she added a throaty groan to her symphony of pleasure. Fuck, he was so close. He kissed along the shell of her ear and watched goose bumps erupt all over her ivory skin. That was it, he couldn’t hold out any longer, he started thrusting harder and faster and let out his own impassioned groan. Somewhere in all that Harley fell over the edge as well with a series of loud screams. If this became a regular thing with Harley he’d be deaf before long. It would be worth it.

After a couple of minutes of clinging to each other and panting it became necessary to get cleaned up. Neither of them were much in the mood to leave the apartment again so they cobbled together some sandwiches from the meager supplies in the kitchen. Harley turned the radio on and it was time for the Wayne Enterprises Orchestra Hour. She gave him an appealing show of her version of the Shimmy and then talked him into dancing with her. Her attempts to teach him the Black Bottom were met with resistance but they came to a generational compromise with the Foxtrot. When his dance partner started yawning her way through a waltz he started to send her off to bed but this time when she turned her big sad eyes on him he couldn’t help but agree to stay with her and decided to go to bed as well. There was no pretense about her sleeping in the other room this time. They both gravitated to the center of the bed and laid next to each other in the dark.

“Mr. J?” She asked in a soft whisper.

“What is it, Doll?”

“I just wanted you to know, this was the best day of my whole life.” Her voice sounded so sincere and a little teary. Her whole life. She was just a kid but it seemed like it had been a pretty lousy life so far. He had probably twice as many years as her but he couldn’t think of a day before he met her when he’d had half as much fun.

“Mine too, Harley.” He suddenly found himself completely wrapped up in her embrace. It was a silly way to sleep but it was pretty great too.


	7. Chapter 7

The Joker hadn’t given any thought to business that night before he went to bed and there shouldn’t really have been much worth thinking about. Just the usual distribution of product to all the places they sold to, so he was surprised when the phone rang just before dawn. It was Bernie, the dumb goon he’d been worried about had screwed up big and that had led to an entire storage barn of hooch going up in flames. It didn’t matter anymore if this guy was a Prohibition Agent or not, he was done for. The Joker gave instructions to have the thug tied up and waiting for him in an out of the way place he liked to conduct his interrogations at. He called Rocco and told him to bring the car around. Next he got dressed as quietly as he could, he hated to wake the little doll up. When he started to leave a pang of conscious hit him and decided he should at least let her know he was leaving so she didn’t wake up scared or worried about him.

“Harley…Harley, wake up for a minute.” He gave her shoulder a gentle shake. She blinked her eyes open and closed a few times and looked confused.

“Mr. J? Why are you dressed?”

“Look, Baby, there’s some trouble with one of the guys who works for me. He let a whole barn of liquor go up in flames and I’ve got to go question him about it. I don’t know how long I’ll be gone, I guess it depends on how tough this guy is and how long he can hold out without giving me answers. I’ll leave you some mad money so you can go out and eat and keep yourself busy while I’m gone.” He was getting ready to tell her go back to sleep but she sat up and threw her arms around him.

“Please let me go with you Mr. J. It’ll only take me a minute to throw a dress on. And I’ll stay out of the way or help you if you’ll let me. Please!” She begged as though he were going out for a night on the town rather than to beat some information out of a traitor.

“You really want to go?” She nodded enthusiastically. “It’s not going to be quick and easy like this afternoon, it could take a long time and get pretty rough.”

Harley leapt out of bed as a confirmation of her desire to go. She ran to the other room and then darted back in pulling a black and white dress over her head, shoes dangling in one hand. He laughed at her frantic attempt at dressing.

“Relax, kid, I won’t leave without you.” She dropped her shoes and took the time to put her dress and stockings on properly now that she wasn’t worried about being abandoned. He sat on the bed smoking while he waited, she was still finished before he was.

“All set to go, Mr. J!” She looked a little bedraggled but enthusiastic. It didn’t matter much, they weren’t going to be seeing anyone who would still be around tomorrow to report on whether or not the seams of her stockings were straight.

The place they were going to was an old garage that was easy to get to from Gotham but far enough out of the city that he didn’t have to worry about anyone hearing any screams that might come from the building. Harley looked excitedly out of the windows on the drive as the rising sun lit up their surroundings. He wondered if she’d still be this enthusiastic when she saw what he’d have to do to this fella to get the answers he needed.

When they got to the garage Rocco stayed outside as lookout and the Joker and Harley went inside to find Frank chained to one of the cement walls wearing only his underclothes. Bernie was an efficient guy, the Joker could always rely on him to get things right.

“Boss! I didn’t do nothin’, I swear!” Frank immediately started pleading his case when he saw he was no longer alone.

“So you’re telling me thousands of dollars of whiskey didn’t burn up tonight?” The Joker replied.

“It did, Boss, but it wasn’t my fault. I was knocked out. There wasn’t nothin’ I could do to stop it.” He was doing his best to look dumb and innocent and he was pretty good at it too but the Joker was a hard man to fool. He took off this hat and jacket and hung them up on a rack out of the range of blood spray.

“Now we both know that’s not exactly what happened, Frank.” He said while rolling up his shirt sleeves to the elbow. He looked over at Harley and saw that she was watching him in fascination. He walked over to a peg board nearby that was stocked with various tools. Some of them were the original tools that had been left behind with the garage when he acquired the property and some were his own personal collection of torture implements. He picked up his favorite, a crowbar. He loved knives but they were messy and you had to be careful or a guy could bleed out before you got your information. He’d start with blunt instruments and work his way towards something meaner.

“So here’s what’s going to happen Frank; you are going to tell me who you work for and anything else about them I ask. I’m just going to keep beating on you until I get the right answer and Frank, I will know when you are lying.” He started to pull his arm back to wallop Frank with the crowbar when he saw Harley standing at his elbow.

“Move back, Baby, and give Daddy room to work.” She nodded and moved to his other side quickly.

He gave Frank a forehand blow to one side of his ribs and then a backhand strike to the other side. Frank’s chains were long enough he could try blocking his ribs with his arms but as he screamed loudly the Joker was sure the goon had just realized how badly it hurts to get hit in the elbow with a crowbar. He couldn’t help but start laughing at Frank. Harley apparently decided he was more interesting to watch than Frank, she moved around a little further so she could watch him bash Frank’s abdomen a few more times while doubling over with laughter at each strike. He stopped for a moment and stared back at her, the look on her face… his little prey animal had turned predator on him again. She was looking at him like she was a cat and he was a mouse she was going to pounce on the first chance she got. It was a little unnerving.

“Doll?” She came out of her predatory trance and looked at him. “You want to choose something from the wall to play with?”

Her face shone with joy. “You mean it, Daddy!”

Ooooh, he liked that a lot. “Of course I do, anything you want.”

She ran off to the wall with a happy squeak and started looking over her options. Knowing it took dames a while to make up their minds the Joker saw this as a good opportunity to see if Frank was in the mood to spill yet.

“Well Frank, you want to tell me what happened tonight? Just to let you know I won’t be stopping until you tell me what happened and I’m very good at this. I can draw this out for weeks if I have to.” Frank was panting and moaning but the Joker hadn’t done much other than give him some bruises so far. He kept his mouth shut. Harley came back over and waited until he turned his attention to her. She’d brought over a small sledgehammer.

“Nice choice, Doll. Go on, have some fun.” Her eyes were bright with excitement and she came over and planted a little kiss on his cheek before standing in front of Frank and looking him over for the best spot to nail him with the hammer.

“Don’t you even try it, you little bitch!” Frank shouted trying to intimidate what he saw as a fragile little flapper. Idiot. Still, couldn’t have anyone talking to his baby that way. He flicked out a stiletto blade and pried Frank’s mouth open with the tip.

“Say another word to her and I’ll cute off your lips. You’ll still be able to tell me what I want, more or less but it will hurt like hell.” Frank looked afraid and nodded a little. “Go on, sweetheart, do whatever you want to him.”

Harley knelt down by Frank’s feet and brought the sledgehammer down so hard on Frank’s big toe that it looked flattened. Frank screamed out loudly but Harley kept going, until she’d pulverized all of his toes and then moved on to the top of his feet. Frank fell down on the concrete floor and sobbed. The Joker admired her dedication to bringing as much pain as possible. When she had finished smashing her victim’s toes she looked up at him. He gave her a smile of approval. She tried moving on to his fingers but Frank didn’t seem to like that idea too well and tried to hide them behind his back. The Joker wacked his former employee’s right elbow until Frank no longer could keep his arm twisted behind him. Now that Harley had access to his fingers and one hand she amused herself by hammering at him with varying amounts of strength while she laughed at the cries each tap of her weapon brought. What a cute kid. Anyone could be violent, it took someone special to have fun with it.

“Very good, Harley. Well Frank, ready to tell us anything?”

“Ok, I told this guy where the barn was, I had no choice. Then he knocked me out, lit the place up and that’s all I know. I can’t tell you anything else.” Frank said wearily, his voice hoarse from screaming.

“Oh, sure you can, Frank. You just started talking, there’s plenty more to say. Tell me about this guy, for a start.”

Frank shook his head no, rapidly. He looked more afraid than he had the whole time they’d been working him over. “No way, he was scarier than you.”

“Scarier than me? Well that’s alright, I’m a pretty amiable guy, I can understand why you might not find me frightening. He was probably scarier than Harley here, too?” The Joker pulled Harley over to his side and wrapped his arm around her as she pressed herself as close to his side as she could. Frank nodded in response to the Joker’s question.

“Think about this though, Frank, was he scarier than Harley and me together?” The Joker asked while poking Frank in the gut with the end of the crowbar. He gave Frank his biggest, cruelest smile. He didn’t know what look Harley’s face was wearing but he had a feeling it was not one that would put a guy at ease. Frank’s eyes went wide and he looked truly terrified.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gee, Frank, how scary could this guy have been?


	8. Chapter 8

When Frank didn’t answer him the Joker gave each of his knees a hard blow with the crowbar. He stood back and let Frank scream for a while. He didn’t want to go to work on the goon’s head just yet, that didn’t help much with getting information. Maybe it was time to bring out his knives for a little while. He stared at Frank speculatively and rubbed his chin with his hand. He felt sure they were close to finding out something about who hired Frank. Harley whispered something quietly in his ear and then blushed when he looked down at her in surprise. Actually why was he surprised? She’d probably been waiting her whole life to do this to a man.

“Frank, Harley’s just made a small request of me and I just can’t say no to the kid. Maybe I spoil her but she’s such a sweet little thing, I just can’t resist. Now I’m going to have to cut through your union suit, Frank. I don’t want you to take it the wrong way and think I’m coming on to you, it’s just that Harley’s always wanted to see what happens if you take a sledgehammer to the family jewels and I’m certainly not going to let her practice on me.” Before the Joker even came near Frank with his knife the man had a panicked look on his face and started screaming.

“Keep that crazy cunt away from me! I’ll tell you anything you want to know but don’t let that bitch near me again.” Frank screamed while trying to curl himself into a protective ball. The Joker and Harley both started laughing hysterically at the sight of him trying to roll up like a hedgehog despite his various injuries.

“Alright Frank, I’ll make you a deal. You answer all my questions honestly and I’ll won’t let Harley touch you again and as a personal favor I’ll kill you quick. You lie to me or try to refuse to talk, then I stand back and let Harley have some fun with you. Deal?”

“Deal! I’ll talk! What do you want to know?” He was crying, maybe in pain but possibly out of relief at the idea that he wouldn’t be watching Harley make hamburger meat out of his dick.

“Aww, phooey!” Harley said in disappointment. That set the Joker’s laugh off again.

“Honestly, Frank, have you ever seen anything like her?” The Joker asked after he got his laughter under control. Harley preened a little at his compliment and Frank looked a little paler at the thought of running into any other dolls like Harley.

“So Frank, spill. Who were you working for?”

“I don’t know who he was, I swear! He just showed up out of nowhere, dressed all in black. He had some sort of cowl over his head, I couldn’t get a look at him. He just appeared out of the night without a sound and disappeared the same way. I’m not even sure the guy was human! He talked in a low gravelly voice and he knew all about me. Told me I had to tell him what I knew or he’d pay my family a visit.” A mysterious figure dressed in black. Could there be such thing as a teetotaler vigilante? The Prohibition Avenger? What a joke.

“What did he want besides information on where the hooch was stored?”

“Anything I could tell him about you or your organization. Which wasn’t much Boss, I only met you one time before today.” Still respectful of a guy that’s beating the hell out of you with a crowbar, that’s a goon for you.

“What else did you tell him?”

“I told him who ran things for you and when shipments were coming in, that sort of thing. That’s all, I don’t know anything else to tell someone anyway. Then tonight he comes in, conks me on the head and then next thing I know I’m in here and Bernie’s telling me to get in the chains or get a bullet in the brain.” He stopped talking and waited to see if the Joker believed him. He did, for the most part. He’d have to spend some time in the future looking into who Frank’s mysterious man in black really was.

“Ok, Frank, thanks for opening up. Harley, he’s all yours.” The Joker stood back to watch his little bearcat go to town on the hood.

“No! Nooooo! You promised you’d keep her off me!” Frank screamed.

“Sorry, Frank, you broke the deal first. I may not pal around with my employees but I know all about them. You don’t have a family. He paid you off. It probably didn’t take much. Since you saw fit to break our agreement first, why would I deny my girl a chance to have a good time?”

“Oh God, noooooo!” Frank shouted as Harley walked over to the peg board and picked up a much larger sledgehammer. She was giggling as she turned and walked back toward Frank. It was a crazed little sound, it sent chills down the spine. This must have been the laugh Cobblepot had tried to tell him about. Such a mad, unsettling giggle, the Joker could see it killing most guys’ erections but as the sound of her laughter raised the hair on the back of his neck he felt a pleasurable tingle run down his body and end at his cock which started to pulse and harden. If it was possible to have a girl custom ordered just for you, Harley was just the little doll he’d want.

“Mr. J, he’s not cooperating, will you hold him for me?” She was right, Frank was curled into a ball of mangled limbs and broken bones.

“Sure, Harley, but watch your aim, ok?”

“I’d never hurt you Mr. J.” She promised solemnly.

The chains that Frank was cuffed to were set up to adjust at the wall, they were currently as long as they got. Frank didn’t have enough unbroken bones to fight against the Joker’s strength as he shortened the slack in the chains. Soon Frank had no choice but to sit up with his arms and legs spread wide. The Joker squatted next to Frank and cut open the crotch of his none too clean union suit. While Frank couldn’t move far he was still trying to twist and move his torso around to avoid letting Harley hit her target so the Joker held him against the wall the best he could while staying out of the way of Harley’s sledgehammer. As much as watching his doll’s violent tendencies excited him this was one act of blunt force trauma he could do without seeing so he watched Frank’s face instead. It was a pretty funny show of disbelief at what was about to happen to him followed by a look of agony unlike anything the Joker had seen before as Harley’s sledgehammer pounded Frank’s member with a loud metallic thunk.

“Oh that, had to hurt, Franky. I’m almost sorry for you.” Frank was still screaming so he missed the Joker’s display of pity.

The Joker let go of the man, it didn’t matter if he moved around now and he did start twisting and writhing in an attempt to deal with his pain. As soon as the Joker pulled away from Frank, Harley brought the sledgehammer down on Frank’s head with as much strength as she could put into her swing. There was a loud cracking sound and then Frank was completely silent. The Joker felt a warm splatter of blood hit his face so he took out his handkerchief and he was kneeling a couple of feet away from Frank, wiping his face, when he was suddenly pounced on. He was knocked off balance and ended up flat on his back with a blur of blond hair and black fabric in a frenzy on top of him. Before he could say anything her lips were on his and her tongue was sliding around in his mouth. Well what was there to say anyway? He returned her kiss and let his hands start wandering around on her body, finally settling on the round curve of her ass. She pulled away from him but rather than get up and end their fun she pulled her dress and chemise up over her head. That left her straddling him in just her stockings and shoes. He tried to sit up a little but she pushed him back down immediately and pulled at the sides of his shirt, ripping it open and sending buttons scattering across the cement floor. Her mouth was back on his while her hands pushed his shirt further open and explored the muscles of his chest and shoulders. She snaked her hands into his sleeves and gave his biceps an appreciative squeeze. He’d never had a dame jump on him and start having her way with him before. Having Harley on top of him, taking what she wanted and crazed with lust? Yeah, he could die happy now.

She kissed her way down his neck, clamping her teeth firmly onto his flesh at the end of each wet sucking smooch. This left echoes of pleasure and pain behind everywhere her mouth went. He occupied himself by caressing and squeezing any part of her he could get into his hands before she shifted again in her passion to cover as much of him as she could with kisses. Her hands were busy undoing his pants. He considered helping her with it but he wanted to give her complete control over what happened between them. Partly because he thought she needed it and partly because he was just curious to see what she would do. Just as he’d stepped back to see how she went about exercising her need for violence, now he wanted to see what her lust driven actions would be. She had his cock out of his pants now and it was hard enough he could drive nails with it. Actually, hammer related dick metaphors weren’t really sitting well with him after what he’d just seen.

Harley started rubbing the head of his cock around her clit. She was wet already and she moaned with each stroke. She wasn’t touching him tentatively now, her grip was firm and determined. She started pushing his dick further along her folds until the head was slipping into her opening just a bit. She lifted up and away from him. He moaned in frustration and she brought her mouth back to his neck and then to his ear.

“You told me some day I’d want it real bad and you were right, Mr. J, I want you.” She purred to him. Goose bumps shot down that side of his body in response to her hot breath in his ear and a jolt of pleasure followed from what she had just said to him.

“Fuck! Harley, I’m all yours!” She sat up a little with a hand pushing down on either side of his chest and looked him in the eye. Hers were full of desire, almost wild with it but there was something else there. Confidence, maybe. Self-assurance. She knew he belonged to her. He sort of wanted to smack that little bit of smugness out of her but not nearly as much as he wanted to fuck her right now. And he knew that outside of this moment she’d be looking at him with those big worshipful eyes again. If he belonged to her at least he had the comfort of knowing he owned her body and soul as well.

She pushed herself back so she could start sliding her slippery folds over his hard dick. As much as he had enjoyed this yesterday he wanted more now. He was about thirty seconds away from flipping her over and taking what he wanted. He knew her well enough to know that the experience would be less satisfying that way. That she would pull away emotionally, that he’d be the only one really in the moment but there came a point when even the Joker starts thinking with his dick instead of his brain and he was getting very close to that point. Before he could go and ruin everything with his uncontrolled need to be inside her, she wrapped her hand around his cock and lined it up with her opening. He wanted to grab her and thrust up into her but his patience was rewarded by her achingly slow descent onto his cock. Every inch she took in sent another wave up pleasure through his body.

Sex for Jack had mostly been a physiological act of necessity, pleasurable in a small way but mostly just something to get rid of his erection so he could move on to something more productive. Very rarely had he been interested in drawing his pleasure out. He always made sure his partner had a good time, he had too much pride not to; but as for his own needs, it wasn’t something worth spending much time on. Harley had changed that for him, just as she’d seemed to crank his sex drive back up to that of much younger man. The Joker would rather cut his own throat than have anything to do with the idea of making love to someone but his body didn’t seem to get the message when it came to Harley. He wanted to give her every pleasure he could and every time he touched her he felt a level of desire and excitement that he never realized he was capable of.

She started to move up and down on his shaft, pulling far enough up that he almost slid out of her and then rapidly descending with a little squeak. This kid and her noises. He watched his cock disappear into her body over and over again, it was a wonderfully obscene visual. She shifted her legs a little and started bouncing up and down rapidly, making her tits bounce beautifully. ‘Ride ‘em cowgirl!’ passed through his mind which caused him to chuckle a little. Harley popped her eyes open and looked down at him then. She slowed her pace and shifted forward a little so she could look into his eyes, maybe she was afraid he was picking up her laughing habit, she looked a little concerned and stopped moving.

“Don’t worry, baby, just having a good time.” She smiled at him and returned to bouncing on his cock.

Apparently she’d liked the lower angle better and leaned forward and put her hands on his shoulders. He could feel her grind herself against his body with each shift down. Her frequent squeaks and squeals turned into long deep moans and her nails started to dig into his skin. He played with her breasts and watched her take her pleasure from him. Not that he wasn’t enjoying himself as well. Her movements now were smaller and more focused as she began to near climax. She was chanting a parade of exclamations like “Oh god!”, “Yes!”, and “Oh Mr. J” over and over until finally she threw her head back and screamed out a series of piercing cries. She collapsed against his chest panting. He took just a moment to appreciate the fact that he had just made Harley come during sex, a feat he was told two days ago was impossible. With his ego pumped up to its maximum he moved on to getting his reward for a job well done. He grabbed Harley’s ass and pulled her hips up enough that he could start thrusting hard and fast into her. She applied what little energy she had left to kissing him. He was probably leaving bruises with his fingers but she wasn’t complaining about his tight grip. In fact she was starting to moan a little into his mouth as his tongue danced around hers.

“Harder!” Harley cried out, pulling away from his kisses. The little brat must think he’s a machine. He slapped her ass playfully. Her eyes popped open in surprise. She tilted her head a little as though considering something and then gave him a naughty smile.

“Harder, Daddy, harder!” It was like that, was it? He gave her an evil grin back and slapped her ass with as much force as he could from the position he was in. This just wouldn’t do. He pulled out of her and flipped her around onto her knees. Before she had time to get her balance he got up on his own knees, hauled off and laid a bruising crack on one cheek and then plunged his cock back into her. She yelped at the smack and followed that with a cry of “Oh, fuck!” when he entered her. He slammed into her as hard as he could over and over.

“Again, Daddy, please! I’m so close.” She begged as he saw her hand disappear under her body so she could play with herself. Christ, and she thought she was close, the Joker could feel the pressure that was building in his body coming to a point where he wasn’t going to be able to hold back anymore. He slowed his pace and gave her another hard smack. She came for the second time with something between a howl and a scream. Her body spasmed with pleasure and the Joker felt something electric pass through his entire body as he finally exploded into her.

His legs felt shaky so he grabbed Harley by her hips and pulled her back down to lie on the ground with him. As their bodies began to calm he started to soften and pulled out of her. For a minute or two he was just lying there waiting for his heart to stop pounding and his breathing to slow. He also really wanted to go to sleep but napping on the dirty floor of his own personal torture chamber wasn’t that appealing. He noticed Harley was up on one elbow doing something. He sat up a little and looked over her shoulder. There was a little pool of blood from Frank that had trailed over to where they were. She had dipped her finger into the blood and made a little drawing. A big red heart surrounded the message J + H. He laid back down and laughed at her.

“Nice artwork, baby.” He said through his laughter. She turned around and looked at him like something was on her mind.

“What is it, Harley?” He asked after he managed to stop his laughing.

“You remember how you said if I ever wanted to try out loving you, I had your permission?”

“Sure I do, it was two days ago Harley.” It felt like longer since this little whirlwind blew into his life. Sort of like she’d always been a part of it.

“Well I tried it out and it’s kind of like breathing; I just gotta do it or I’ll die.” The sincerity in her voice was too much for him, he had to lighten things up with a little joking around.

“Anyone ever tell you you’re one daffy dame?” He spun one finger around in a circle by the side of his head while he laughed at her.

“Don’t tease me, I mean it, I love you. I know you don’t love me but I had to tell you anyway.” Her lips pushed out into a very kissable pout.

“Who told you I don’t love you?” He asked angrily.

“No one, Mr. J.” She looked up at him hopefully.

“That’s right and if anyone ever tries, you just send them my way, I’ll straighten them out.” He wasn’t going to say it but she would know what he meant. She just got him in a way he never thought anyone could. She was staring at him now with big shiny eyes and a huge smile on her face. With a happy squeak she wrapped her arms around him and kissed him.

“Mr. J, you think we could go away for a couple of days? I’d really like to take you home with me and introduce you to my parents.” She gave him with a look of evil glee. She wanted to introduce him to her parents alright, and then together they’d be introducing her folks to Harley’s new fondness for bloodshed. Sounded like a humdinger of an idea to him.

“Sure, Baby, let’s make sure to pack a sledgehammer.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I'd love to know what you think in the comments. This may be the beginning of a series, I haven't completely made my mind up but you might see Jazz Age Joker and Harley again some day.


End file.
